A Marauder Adventure in Three Parts
by Shadow Phantom
Summary: Oh,' says Remus faintly. 'Blood.' The Marauders take a trip to the Forbidden Forest. It doesn't go quite as planned.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own it. And therefore cry myself gently to sleep every night.

Note: This was a fun little project done in three nights. I would ask a friend for a number and word and then decide how the number would apply to the story. Part one actually takes place after part two as to set up the mood.

_A Marauder Adventure in Three Parts_

_Part One_

"Remind me exactly why we did that," Remus says, looking uncharacteristically shaken up and pale. He pauses to lean against the new fence by Hagrid's hut. Small, round, orange things are starting to appear among the leafy greens since their planting two days before, but Remus doesn't have time to ponder this anomaly.

"Why not?" Sirius grins, but it's uneasy, as if he's trying to cover up his own panic and nausea. He picks a small stick out of his hair. "We escaped unharmed, didn't we?"

"Wish I could say the same for my cloak," James says mournfully, appearing from the tree line, Invisibility Cloak wrapped up in his arms like a newborn baby. "Peter nearly killed himself untangling it from that bush." He shoots a pointed look at Sirius.

For once, Sirius doesn't bother to try and put the blame on someone else. "Where is Wormtail, anyway?"

A loud heaving sound is heard in the distance, before Peter totters into view, the physical embodiment of what all of them feel. "Shouldn't have eaten that second helping of dinner," he manages to get out faintly.

This time it's Remus who is losing his mashed potatoes, among the baby pumpkin plants.

"Sorry." Sirius's statement can hardly be heard.

"Excuse me?" James asks. "I almost mistook the wind for an apology." He's angry, Sirius can tell, but not so much that he won't speak to Sirius.

"Sorry," Sirius says again, more boldly.

Remus heaves again.

"Perhaps you shouldn't be apologizing to me," James suggests. "Come on, Wormtail, I'll take you to Pomfrey. She'll be expecting us." The strange shape that is James and Peter morphs into a shadow and then disappears in the distance.

Sirius is almost afraid to approach Remus. Not so much because of the fact that his werewolf friend has just been violently ill and his face suggests that he will continue to be ill, possibly all over Sirius, but more because his face also suggests he will relish in being ill all over Sirius.

"Lovely pumpkins," he says finally, casting a desperate glance towards the patch.

"Yes. Lovely," Remus grunts.

"Are you angry with me?" he asks.

Remus merely groans, and that _thing_ happens to his face, where it's obvious he's annoyed and upset and million other things, but he's not really. Sirius can't really describe it. It's just a _thing_. Moony's thing.

"I'll help you to the hospital wing," Sirius offers, and Remus is ill all over his shoes.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: There is no chance this is mine.

Note: This is the reason why I made this story rated why it is. I got a number and decided to make it the number of times a swear word would appear. I had an insanely fun time writing this portion.

_Part Two_

"This is so _stupid_, just because you got into a fight with your stupid cousin is no reason we should come out and here and try to get back at her, it's all dark and I can't see anything, and Sirius, are you listening to me?"

"Unfortunately," Sirius mutters. "Peter, you great pillock, can you just _shut up_ for once in your life?"

Peter makes an indignant as his reply, but says nothing. Off to the right, Sirius can hear something sigh that sounds like Remus. "It's not his fault you're angry with Bellatrix, Sirius. Can anybody see _anything_?"

"No." That would be James, off to the left, sounding as annoyed as Wormtail and Moony. "Did you have to pick the crescent moon, Sirius?" Well what was he supposed to do? Plan an outing during the full moon? Although Remus won't admit it, he gets steadily more nervous as the moon waxes, but is too weak when the moon is new. So, a small sliver makes perfect sense.

Unfortunately, that means absolutely no light under the thick foliage of the trees surrounding them, which is resulting in many intimate encounters with spiky bushes and rough tree trunks.

Well, he reasons, they've been off the path for a few minutes now, and out of the Invisibility Cloak for quite some time, so wands should be safe very soon. There's a scuffling sound to the right (James, then), and soft, "_Fuck_, this _is_ stupid. Lumos!" Suddenly, a pale light creeps out from behind some branches, followed by James's sweaty face. He takes off his glasses and wipes them on his shirt.

Sirius can't help thinking that the lighting of James's wand is not at all an improvement. Previously, any wild beasts could have eaten him while he was still happy. Now, every movement of the shadows is making him twitch. Sirius isn't the only one on edge. The Marauders have been in the Forbidden Forest many times before, but in the past it was mostly with something more daunting than the lurkers that frequent this place.

"No light then?" James asks tersely, as he starts at seeing the shadow of Peter absentmindedly swinging the Invisibility Cloak.

"No prank then?" Peter adds hopefully, glancing fearfully about himself.

The light goes out, and a shiver passes across the group.

"It seems we are at an impasse," Remus comments in the dark. "Light or no light, that is the question."

"Shut up, Moony," Sirius snaps, feeling slightly hysterical. Shouldn't this be the other way around? Shouldn't he be the one slaughtering the famous dead Muggle writers?

A twig crunches.

Something high pitched (a scream, maybe?) follows soon after, and James let out a loud grunt. "_Fuck_!" A stifling silence follows, and Sirius allows the bead of sweat to drip down his nose before he opens his mouth to speak. It's no use though, as James is yelling out obscenities.

"What happened?" That would be Remus, of course. He's the only one who could sound calm and in control in the middle of a Forbidden Forest filled with dangerous creatures in the middle of a pitch black night even though the venture wasn't his decision in the first place.

Sirius makes a mental note to hex Bellatrix to hell when he sees her again.

There is brief light from Peter's wand, but only for seconds before it goes out. This time it's Peter who needs his mouth cleaned out. "Bloody hell, my wand just broke! Snapped in half! Do wands normally do that? Sirius, where the hell did you take us, you stupid bastard?"

"Just calm down." Ha, a fine thing to say, James. "Just fucking calm down, all right? All we have to do is hold hands, and walk out of here."

"Didn't know you felt that way about me, James old pal."

"Fuck you, Sirius."

A frenzy of motion, and Sirius is suddenly pinned to the grass. "Well, hello there," he says bemusedly. Hands are kept sedately at his sides, as he's not quite sure who's pinning him. With James he would be vulgar, with Peter tickling, and with Remus, well...

"Sorry about that," Remus apologizes, and tries to climb to his feet, elbowing Sirius a times as he does. "Argh, the dark is so – sorry – irritating, this really was stupid – ouch, that must have hurt – there. Do you need help?"

"No, it's all right," Sirius wheezes in reply. He can feel dampness creeping through the back of his robes, and imagines that it's just his luck to have landed in a puddle of mud. New robes too, freshly laundered.

Oh well, James shouldn't let Sirius borrow his clothes anyway.

Sirius gets to his feet and wipes his now damp hands against the front of the robes, then stumbles into Remus. "Do you smell that?" Remus asks.

"I just took a shower this morning, Moony, if you're suggesting – "

"No, it's not." He sniffs the air delicately, Sirius can hear that slight intake of breath. "I need to light my wand. That can't be just a bit of mud."

As the pale light flickers into being, Sirius wishes that Bellatrix had just kept her opinions to herself and instead written him a polite fancy letter like all good cousins should just to let him know that although he had run away she was still being forced to write to him.

"Oh," says Remus faintly. "Blood."

There's something strange about Remus, and Sirius doesn't know if it's with all werewolves, but he is under the belief that blood is better used and not seen. Nonetheless, he moves his wand down the trickle, which becomes a puddle, and then –

In the time before the light flickers out, Remus's face significantly pales, and Sirius fights the urge to let go of his lunch. "We need to find James and Peter," Remus says, his voice weak, his intent strong.

Sweaty hands grasp in the dark, and they start forward slowly. "James?"

"Over here, Sirius. Great hell, what was that?"

There's a muffled thud, and Peter squeaks. "Ow! It was me! What was _that_?"

All four marauders go silent, and listen carefully for any sounds besides their heavy, panicked breathing in the early autumn air.

"_Shit_!" Sirius promptly voices all sentiments. "Fucking hell bugger shit bollocks!"

"FUCKING RUN!" James roars. He doesn't have to repeat himself.

They scatter like four very scared boys about to wet themselves in an almost pitch black forest.

This time, none are worried about the branches poking at their faces, arms and legs as the tear towards the path (which they never should have strayed from in the first place), and consequently, safety.

Something snags the back of Sirius's borrowed robes. "Fuck James!" he hisses, and claws his way out. Why would James want to wear something covered in blood anyway? Especially blood that...

He's going to be ill if he thinks that way.

Ragged breaths sound on either side of Sirius, but he can't decide if this is from fellow Marauders or from whatever the hell is going to try and kill them. "Hell!" James yells. "Fucking shit! The Cloak! It...it caught on something!"

"_Sod it_!" Sirius yells back. "Sod your goddamn cloak!"

"It'll be the end of us!" James bemoans, but his voice is moving again, and broken by his feet pounding against the ground. "We'll never be able to carry out anything ever again!"

"Marauders are not constituted by – " Sirius stops and tries to swallow the burning vomit feeling at the base of his throat " – by things! We are an idea! A creation!"

Silence replies to this statement.

"Buggering hell," he gasps. "Where did you leave it?"

Peter lets out a sound that suggests he has just been impaled, or had a limb severed from his body. James let out a strangled cry. Remus's voice is muffled against the ground. "I hate this place," he says. Then, he in a very non-Remus way he adds, "Sirius, you great bastard."

Sirius gropes for his fallen friend, and finally manages a hold on the shoulders of his robes. "I'm the bastard?" Sirius demands. "I'm not some bloody beast waiting to have at it with your insides!" Heaving mightily, Remus is once again restored his feet.

"I think I've got it!" Peter cries out.

"You _think_?" James's voice is dangerously rising. "You'd better be _fucking_ sure, Peter!"

Think is good enough for Sirius, and he starts to run again.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Sadly, not mine.

Note: Here is the final installment. That's really all I've got to say.

_Part Three_

When light filters into the dormitory on Sunday morning, Sirius rolls over with a groan. The night before has taken its toll on his calves, and his arms, and his back. He sits up slowly and painfully and looks over to see if Peter has been let out of the clutches of Madam Pomfrey yet. No such luck.

Through the half-drawn curtains around Remus's four poster, however, it is obvious that Moony has returned after his intimacy with several bed pans. He is drawn up in a ball, knees to his chest. Sirius wonders if he's feeling any better, and never one to remain still, he climbs out of bed and tiptoes over to his sleeping friend.

"Moony...?" he ventures softly, poking Remus in the middle of the back. Unlike his counterparts, who all sleep in boxers and sometimes (mostly in Sirius's case) nothing at all, he wears sweatpants and an undershirt to bed.

Remus shifts and rolls over, looking to be as sore as Sirius feels. He's only half awake, and still looks partially ill, but he smiles anyway. "Morning Sirius," he murmurs. "Time is it?"

That's a good question. Sirius looks down at the watch perpetually strapped to his wrist. "Almost ten." A disbelieving look crosses Remus's face, and for good reasons. The first being that Sirius never wakes up voluntarily before noon on the weekends, and the second being that after last nights adventures they have slept for total of five hours.

"Why'd you wake me up?" he demands, his eyes closing again, and his face mashing into his feather pillow.

"I just wanted to make sure you were feeling better," Sirius says. Immediately afterwards he feels like an over-worried mother. Remus isn't in the hospital wing, and he's not retching anymore, or having nightmares, so obviously he's feeling better. Better doesn't necessarily equal good, though, he justifies to himself.

A moan emerges from the depths of the pillow, demanding to know why Sirius won't just let him sleep in peace. "Yes. Loads. I believe after intense therapy I will be able to look at tomato juice without feeling ill."

Sirius shivers, remembering what they had seen. "What d'you think did that?" he asks. Although he grew up in a household that didn't believe in shielding children from the effects of horrible spells and creatures, he's never seen something so shredded. He's not even sure what it used to be.

The lines of Remus's shoulders tighten, and he doesn't say anything for a long while. He turns his head slowly, so that his face is no longer pressed against his pillow. "I'd rather not think about it."

"I know, but it was so...animals don't do that. They kill and then take what the need, and leave the bones or the...well...this was just..." he trails off.

Remus says nothing. He looks to be thinking on something and then he says. "We roamed the Forbidden Forest last full moon."

That's all he needs to say to make Sirius feel very stupid. "I'm going back to sleep," he adds, and rolls over, back facing Sirius again.

Sirius sits there quietly and awkwardly, then gets up and lies back on his four poster, staring up at the ceiling. He wonders what to do about it for some time, then finally decides that maybe ignoring the problem at hand is the best way to deal with it. After all, despite his best efforts, Sirius does not seem to be bred for angst.

The dormitory door opens, and Peter wanders in. His arm is impressively bandaged, and he's a sight paler than usual, but other than that he actually doesn't look too bad. "Morning Sirius," he yawns and crawls into bed without any indication of anything else.

Maybe it's the Marauders that aren't particularly bred for angst. Or perhaps it's just the fact that as boys they all ignore problems.

Sirius decides he likes this and goes back to sleep.


End file.
